Comic Books Make Me Cooler

Most people associate comic book nerds as just that. Nerds. I can't deny that reading about men in capes beating up on men wearing fish bowls as helmets is pretty nerdy. Reading these kinds of stories can make you look especially lame if you are ashamed or embarrassed of your passion though. However, if you own up to your love of comic books, a whole world of wonders opens up to you. Your love of comic books can actually make you cool.

Think about it. Anyone who is an expert in something is automatically cool. Oh that guy throws the best football pass? That's so cool! This girl wears the best fashions? Awesomeness!!! Same concept. I'm that guy who knows every superhero's alter ego and villains. I know how Peter Parker died in the Ultimate Universe (spoiler alert). I know how Captain America died (and came back), how Thor's going to die, the entire Green Lantern mythos, Batman's son's name, and even all the changes being made in the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles story. If loving comic books were like being a celebrity, I'd be Justin Bieber. If it were a movie, I'd be Forrest Gump. A sport - football. A liquor - Qream. An SAT section - analogies. That's pretty darn cool, right?

I'm so glad I'm cool. My life would be lame without comic books. I don't even know if I'd have a sense of identity without my pals Namor and Silver Surfer hanging out with me on Wednesdays. I wouldn't have that "thing" that makes me different or better than everyone else. There's nothing cool about that. I suppose I could find another "thing." But what? Videogames? Videogame junkies always end up about as cool as Fred Savage. Movies? Movie buffs are so precocious. Avatar rules! If I didn't have comic books in my life, my attention would probably turn to sports. One must be careful when it comes to sports though. It's a very slippery slope. Falter just a little, and your love for sports can easily be turned to hate.

Enter, Neal Folger. Here we have a man who is the most decent of decent dudes. He goes to church every Sunday. Helps the poor. Loves his mother. And recycles. There is a darkness in his heart though. Sports. His passion started just like any fan's. He likes the Falcons and wants them to succeed. Countless moons pass and all he experiences is failure and heartache, splintering his soul. No longer is winning what he desires. He must have company in his misery. Neal now cares more about your team losing than he does about his team winning. His appetite for hate grows with every passing second. The number of teams he must see lose every week has gone from 3 to 2,915 in only three and a half years. What started as Georgia, has grown to encompass America's team (the Cowboys), and even God's own team (Notre Dame). This once pure soul has been hideously transformed into a black abyss completely void of anything resembling happiness. Poor Neal. Thank you, comic books.

That's only an extreme example. Most people's passion brings out the best in them. If it's something weird, like a cat obsession (you know who you are), then you immediately become more human and easier to joke around with. Meow meow. If your passion is something incredibly difficult, you are the person that will get friendly challenges. Everyone loves duels. Rubics-cube-off! Now. I just won. We all have something we're known for. And pretty much every time, that something makes us cooler people.

So I'm proud of my comic book collection. Every summer all the cool kids come to ask me about all the superhero movies coming out. If someone needs to know what exactly San Diego Comic Con is, that person knows to look for me. What's the deal with the DC relaunch? Grab a chair, partner. It sure feels good to be cool. And it's all thanks to comic books.



**Leave a comment letting me know how super cool you think I am.**